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LifeRhyme Notes
April 2007
By Rochelle Melander, Coach
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IN THIS ISSUE...
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So Much More!
Write Now! Retreat Update
Success Boot Camp
Read an Excerpt from My Book
So Much More!
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Fumbling his confidence
And wondering why the world has passed him by
Hoping that he's bid for more than arguments
And failed attempts to fly, fly
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
—Switchfoot, Meant to Live
on The Beautiful Letdown
About a month ago, my husband told me about a church that was advocating a
"complaint-free world." The pastor challenged everyone to go complaint-free for
21 days.
At first I loved the idea--especially for other people. I could go through a day
without hearing my children say, "How come you do everything wrong?" I even
tried it.
But, telling myself to not complain all
day just made me think about complaining all the more. The more I thought about
not complaining, the more I wanted to complain! It reminded me of going on a
diet. You know, you say to yourself, "Don't eat the ice cream, brownies,
cookies, and chips" and, before you know it, you're eating it all.
Instead, why not replace complaining with another action?
Here are some that might work:
1. Lament. Sometimes small, constant complaints are signs of big griefs.
Psychologists have proven that writing down your laments, your story of the
difficulties of your life, can be physically healing. Ask yourself, "What story
do I need to tell?"
2. Ask. Complaints can hide needs. We complain about a friend who talks
compulsively because we need this friend to hear us. Look at the content of your
complaints and ask yourself, "What do I need?" Ask for it!
3. Practice gratitude. Once, when I was complaining about some marketing snafu
with one of my books, it hit me:
I wrote a book. I felt immediately grateful that I have the opportunity to do
what I love. Ask yourself, "Is there anything in this situation I am grateful
for?"
4. Let go. Constant complaining can be a neon sign that you need to let go of
something--perhaps a relationship, a job, or a commitment. Evaluate the
situation. If you've done what you could (including asking for what you need),
and nothing has changed, it may be time to leave!
5. Create. In the midst of complaining, I have found that digging into the
projects I am passionate about can bring relief, healing, and hope.
I love the line in the Switchfoot song, "we were meant to live for so much
more." We are. You are. And maybe the biggest reason to replace complaints with
something else is this: complaints can keep us from that 'so much more.' And
that's a shame. Without your 'so much more,'
the world is missing something!
Make your own list of things to do instead of complaining.
Then ask: How does it change your life?
To the presence and the promise of SO MUCH MORE in our lives!
--Rochelle
WRITE NOW! Weekend Retreat Update
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The Spring Retreat:
April 26-29, 2007
Milwaukee, WI
The WRITE NOW! Weekend Retreat package will give you:
The Write Now! retreat will be held at the
beautiful Residence Inn in downtown Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
(http://www.ResidenceInnMilwaukee.com)
The hotel is located on the Milwaukee
River and in walking distance to many restaurants, entertainment venues, city
parks, and Lake Michigan.
Retreat Details:
When and Where
The Spring Retreat:
April 26-29, 2007
The Residence Inn
Milwaukee, WI
Registration Fee
The cost of the retreat, separate
from hotel, meals, and travel, is:
$500.00 check, cash, or credit card
Registration Deadlines
The retreat is limited to TEN participants.
The deadline for registration is April 15th.
Note: Hotel registration is no longer available at the special rate. Guests may
call The Residence Inn to negotiate good rates.
For more information and a registration form, contact Rochelle Melander at:
rochelle@LifeRhymeCoaching.com
414-963-1222
For more information about Rochelle's coaching, visit:
http://www.LifeRhymeCoaching.com
Meet the Write Now! retreat leader, Rochelle Melander:
I've written nine published books, a master's thesis, and more than one hundred articles. I've been editing books and articles since 1994.
And I have coached many writers through their own writing projects since 2000. At the same time, I've been busy having a life--working, maintaining relationships, and parenting children. People often ask me, "How do you do it?" They mean, "How do you manage to write and have a life?"
I've been doing it for a long time. I wrote my master's thesis in one year, while doing the graduate coursework, teaching, babysitting, cleaning houses, and trying to have a life. Nearly every book I wrote with my husband was completed in less than three months, often in as little time as six weeks. In the fall of 2004, my friend Sue Lang and I wrote a book in nine days. This past year, I wrote my first solo book--a 500-pager--in just over five months.
In this weekend retreat and the coaching sessions that come with it, I'll be teaching you the tools I have used for more than 15 years to envision, structure, and complete writing projects. Listen to what participants and clients say about my work:
Rochelle Melander is not only a gifted writer developing her own ideas, she is also someone with skill to help other writers find their voice.
As a University faculty member with a Ph.D, I have learned that I need someone who can understand the spirit and content of what I want to write about in my particular field. Rochelle’s coaching style and skills attended to my voice and ideas and worked to clarify and develop these ideas. The retreat also offered practical steps in overcoming some of the roadblocks that keep me from writing.
—Jan Ewing, PhD
http://www.ctcsd.org/
[The retreat] gave me inspiration in several forms: this included you, Rochelle, reminding us that if we write three pages a day, at the end of year, we'll have a book! That was the kind of "bite-able bite" that I needed to hear. It put perspective on my feeling of hopelessness that I would EVER get a book done. That it seems "do-able" is a great mental leap for me, and I thank you for pointing that out.
—Ingrid Huebner, Fall 2006 Write Now! Participant
Success Boot Camp
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I want to let you know about a great program offered by a colleague and friend:
Caroline Adams Miller is an ACC-credentialed coach, as well as one of the first
coaches to graduate from the cutting-edge Masters in Applied Positive Psychology
from the University of Pennsylvania. She and her partner, Steve Kraus, PhD
(former teacher of the year from Harvard University!) have teamed up to offer
"Success Boot Camp" for people wanting to learn more about the intersection
between goal-setting and Positive Psychology. This ten-week virtual class has
graduated dozens of people, who now form alumni Mastermind groups, and the
comments are unanimous that this is a one-of- a-kind opportunity to learn about
how to set and achieve goals while also raising well-being. To sign up or learn
more, go to: www.carolinemiller.com and click on "Groups."
A Generous Presence
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My new book, A Generous Presence: Spiritual Leadership and The Art of Coaching,
was named by Frederic and Mary Ann Brussat to be one of The 50 Best Spiritual
Books of 2006!
The Brussats select these books from the
over 300 books they review each year.
See the book under "coaching" on the list:
http://www.spiritualityandpractice.com/books/features.php?id=16408
Get the book here:
http://www.alban.org/BookDetails.asp?ID=1911
Read an excerpt here:
http://www.alban.org/weekly/web/109_060821.html
Read a new excerpt here:
http://www.alban.org/weekly/2007/070305_Generosity.asp
Read a review by Frederic and Mary Ann Brussat here:
http://www.spiritualityandpractice.com/books/books.php?id=15999
Inspired?
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Are you inspired by what you read here?
Then pass it on!
Interested in connecting around the important issues of life?
Give me a call at 414-963-1222 or send me an e-mail
(rochelle@liferhymecoaching.com)
to set up a free coaching consultation!
SUBSCRIPTION INFORMATION
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LIFERHYME NOTES in the subject line.
LIFERHYME NOTES 2007 is a free monthly e-mail newsletter designed to consider
how we can integrate spirituality and creativity into our daily lives. It is
written and produced by Rochelle Melander, personal and professional coach. If
you have any questions or comments, please send them to:
rochelle@liferhymecoaching.com.
I would love to hear from you.
Feel free to forward your copy of LIFERHYME NOTES to anyone you think might
enjoy it. I do request that you keep the entire newsletter intact, including my
contact and copyright information.
This newsletter is COPYRIGHT 2007
by ROCHELLE MELANDER,
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
Do not quote without the
written permission of the author.